.One Month Down.

.. and two to go, that is before we know whether the Clomid Brad is taking is making any improvements on his count. We acutally don’t go back for another SA until mid September which is actually 1/2 through a 4th cycle … I’m going to check and see if they have cancellations as the time nears. Two weeks may not seem like a big deal to some, but being halfway through another cycle without having any results essentially means another month ‘wasted’ that I myself cannot be on drugs at the same time (I know that’s not technically true but that’s how I feel). I really wish I knew the statistics of having both male and female infertility within the same couple; whatever the number .. it’s hard not to feel broken. Even one of my fertility apps makes me feel like a failure. Prior to TTC I used Ovuview just to track my cycles since I went off birth control, so although I rely on Fertility Friend now, I still input my info in there too. When I went to enter my Day 1 menses, triggering a new cycle, a little “lightbulb tip” went off that read, “It may take a healthy couple 3 to 6 months to conceive” … gee thanks Ovuview I just finished cycle 18, thanks for the encouragement!!

The entire month of June we’ve both just been in a funk … a slump of some kind. The news we received on the 2nd really did a number to us both emotionally and it’s taken some time to process, all the while numerous people in our age group are either announcing or giving birth to their second child. Plus I’ve been laid off .. which adds financial stress, we still get by but there’s no putting money aside for say… IVF. Then there’s the RAIN … and if you recall my husband is a farmer. It has literally rained for weeks straight, with maybe one day here and there, but not enough warm/dry time to soak up the fields. Alot of farmers in the Hoosier state are going to be hurting, there has been so much flooding it’s absolutely absurd. Thank goodness for crop insurance, it at least allows you some reassurance, but nevertheless, saying my hubby is stressed is an understatement!!

Lastly, there is the continuing situation with Brad’s sister. Karie has had good days and bad, in and out of the hospital receiving fluids, running temps on and off. Up to this point, the doctors have said the hormone therapy is working and the cancer throughout her body remains stable, but we’ve now found out the that therapy is only work 90% (which is still good) but that other 10% is allowing cancerous spots to form on her skull. The only way they feel they can try to get this under control is with Chemo … the word everyone has dreaded. Currently as I type this, she is having her pump placed and tomorrow she will begin her first round of Chemo. Luckily, she is starting with a low dose and not a very grueling schedule, hopefully it won’t make her as sick as we fear it might. Prayers are always appreciated for peace, strength, and healing.

One big change did happen this month … we are now a family of four! I wrote a few posts ago about possibly fostering a blind dog that was at a local rescue, well we did, and in a few short days the adoption papers will be signed and sweet little Lulu will be officially ours. We’ve currently had her for just over 3 weeks and she has come a long way during that time. She needs some entensive dental work, we’ve already fought an infection in her gums that she had when she came to us .. and later this week she will go in for a cleaning and any possible extractions. Although we weren’t looking for another dog, or looking to spend this kind of money, little Lou is a sweetheart who’s had a hard life and just wants a lap to lay on and someone to love. It’s been amazing to see her little personality come out. Gio is coming around but he still doesn’t know what to think of her at times … or why she runs into him, but hopefully after awhile they will become buddies. Enjoy some cute photos 🙂